


Bittersweet

by obscureshipyard



Category: Burnt (2015)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys Kissing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fix-It, M/M, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-03-23 23:27:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13798581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/obscureshipyard/pseuds/obscureshipyard
Summary: Tony's fantasy finally comes to fruition and he spends the night with Adam. But does one night of sex really mean anything? Is he too desperate and broken to see that Adam might be using him? Is he too bitter and jaded to let true feelings in?





	Bittersweet

**Author's Note:**

> Post movie fix-it. All credit to original creative team behind the film.

“Yes, yes. Fuck me, please. Harder, Adam, please.” Tony clawed at the filthy sheets beneath them. His partner's only response was to pick up the pace, pounding harder into his ass. Tony was seeing stars. The steps that had lead them to their current level of entanglement were mostly an alcohol soaked blur but his world weary heart didn't care to dwell.

They were here. He was here. Adam Jones, the ill-fated love of his life was here, with him, inside of him. Sure, Tony felt so drunk he could barely see straight but if he just blocked that small detail out he could pretend like this was all real. He could imagine this was a world where Adam truly cared about him as more than just an employer, a meal ticket, a stepping stone to his own greatness. The thoughts and familiar self loathing began to fill his mind until tears were collecting in his eyes.

“Shhh, shh, baby, no, stay here with me. No tears.” Adam's voice was low and sweet. His lips were at Tony's ear. Tony was shocked the other man had been paying close enough attention to notice the small detail of his lover crying.

Tony had figured Adam would be a more selfish lover, too focused on his own pleasure and prowess to pay attention to his partner. At least he figured that's what he would be like with Tony. Jealous thoughts pictured Adam to be a regular Casanova with his female partners, caring, attentive, courteous. But it was just him. Just Tony the love-struck fag who had been fawning over the chef for years. He was nothing special.

Didn't Adam know he could be as selfish and rude as he wanted and Tony would always come crawling back for more? It was how their relationship worked in the light of day. Adam was rude and disrespectful and Tony let him march all over him like the world's most needy doormat just hoping for a glimpse of that smile, a drop of true affection. Why should this be any different?

Tony would give his body willingly for Adam to use just hoping the other man might actually find he liked the taste. It was a dream, he was sure of it. This night wouldn't be happening if not for too much wine and desperation. Adam must have been having a dry spell of epic proportion to sink to fucking the lonely maitre'd.

But things had been changing at the restaurant since they had gotten their three stars. Adam had been proving himself a changed man and Tony had been happy about it in a way. It had stung seeing the man he cared for so deeply sink into self destruction and addiction all those years ago until he quite literally fell off the face of the earth. But upon his triumphant return Tony found the pain was worse. Adam had proved himself sane and said he didn't love him. He was steady and level headed and couldn't be with him. The truth was plain and logical and broke Tony into pieces. Tony was made for Adam but Adam wasn't made for him. Tony had found the love of his life and all he got in return was kind indifference. It was hell.

But things had been changing still. Since settling in with their new found level of companionship and accomplishment Adam had become a new man, a better man than any of them had known. He hadn't taken another lover let alone a string of them as was once his way. And it wasn't for lack of offers, everyone knew the gossip. But the word was that Adam had been leaving the young female staff members be, even actively avoiding the more aggressive social climbers wanting to bed the head chef.

Adam's hips picked out a deep pounding rhythm against Tony's prostate that had his eyes crossing. An embarrassing high pitched whine left his throat but Adam didn't laugh. He seemed to find it an encouragement to fuck even deeper. Tony went hazy again. How lucky must he have been that evening? What magical phrase had he finally uttered to make the love of his life look at him twice? Adam had always been very flirty with him but it had been different lately. Thinking back the only ones Adam had bothered to flirt with these days were his close friends, his sous chef and other trusted assistants in the kitchen, and Tony. Adam always flirted with Tony.

He had grown used to it over the years as childish teasing, something Adam did with everyone. But it had been the one constant in their relationship. Adam teased, Tony fell deeper into doomed love, and they made great food. But it was changing, now instead of using kind words and coquettish observations to throw the matire'd off his game they now seemed to fall under the category of actual compliments and meaningful observations. Tony had no idea how to handle the new man his love had become.

Teeth nipping at the back of his neck was the only warning of his lover's change of pace before a skilled hand circled around his waist to grasp tightly on to Tony's cock. He cried out at the sensation as that hand began stroking him past sanity. Adam teased him mercilessly as he fucked him. Tony was begging him in German, Italian, Spanish, English, French, every language he knew. He was close. He wished they were face to face. He wanted to be able to see Adam's face and hold on to him when he came. But he knew how stupid that thought was even as he ached for it.

Adam didn't want to look at him, how could he? This wasn't about love, just a quick pity fuck because Tony was a sure thing who would never say no. Adam had to know Tony would throw himself at his feet and thank him for the privilege. He put on a brave face most days but in the dark of the evening and at the bottom of the bottle he was still just that desperate kid in Paris so in love with the wrong man.

Tony swallowed the tears this time. Instead he put his energy into fucking back on to his lover's cock at just the right angle. Adam's hand was currently ringing the life out of him. That mixed with the pounding of Adam's cock on his prostate and Tony was close. The pleas escaped him in one language or another.

"Yeah, baby, you gonna cum for me? Fuck, I want to feel it. Feel your ass squeezing on my cock as you cum." The filthy words at his ear took him completely by surprise. Coupled with the tightening grip on his dick they were just enough to shove him right over the edge. His hips bucked and ass bared down forcing Adam to groan and stop his thrusting while they rode each other out. Tony was moaning so loud he was sure he should be embarrassed but he was too far passed caring. Adam Jones had fucked him to orgasm. It was hard to think of anything else that really mattered in his life past that.

When his brain had finally cleared enough to form thought again Tony noticed that Adam must have cum as well. He felt sore from where fingers had dug into his hips to hold him still and the larger man was currently collapsed on top of him breathing in the sweat and sex filled air at Tony's throat. Neither man spoke as Tony's arms finally gave out and they both fell gracelessly down onto the mattress beneath them. Before Tony could catch his breath arms were tight around his waist pulling him in close. Adam was a cuddler it seemed. Didn't that just figure? His hot breath still tickled the back of Tony's neck. It was heaven. It was the worst torture he had ever faced.

He wasn't sure what was coming next. Would Adam expect him to leave? Would he pull out some well practiced speech about how this was fun and they should stay friends? The tempting call to just ignore his own instincts and surrender to sleep was heady but his anxiety jumbled mind resisted. He felt the breath at his neck deepen and slow. The restraining grip at his waist went slack. Nervously he dared a look back at his lover.

Adam's beautiful features were slack with sleep. Tony was completely torn. He could risk staying and waking up to Adam trying to gnaw off his own arm to get quietly away from him. He might even consent to being friends with benefits now, though Tony was sure Adam would insist on keeping it a secret, to protect Tony's reputation he might even say. It all hurt so much inside to think about the ways this was going to end.

Tony quietly slipped from between Adam's arms and the warmest bed he had ever known. This was going to end badly one way or another, tonight, tomorrow morning, but soon. So he left before Adam woke and broke him completely.

\------

“Tony, can I talk to you?” And he thought he had done such a good job of avoiding Adam. He had only dared to venture into the kitchen when he was taking a call or sure that Adam was too focused on plating the lunch and dinner rushes to notice. But the bustle was dying down and the night drawing to a close. Tony had peeked in an not seen Adam at his usually place at the pass so he had risked stepping inside. The bastard must have been waiting for him.

“A bit busy now, can it wait?” Tony was trying to keep his tone flippant but was fairly certain he was failing. He needed to convince Adam that he could move forward with this charade. They could just pretend last night had never happened and neither of them would ever have to worry about the repercussions or broken hearts. Perhaps if he got the other man to believe the lie he could believe it himself.

“Uh, not really, no.” Adam's eyes were down cast. He looked like a kicked puppy and Tony's heart was breaking for a whole new list of reasons. He didn't want to hurt Adam. No matter what the other man did to him Tony had just never been able to muster up any true wrath or lasting desire to see Adam hurt in any way. But he knew what was coming next. Couldn't he just go along with the shared lie and pretend last night had never happened? Tony was giving him the perfect out, why would he fight it?

So he tightened the grip on his carefully crafted mask shrugged like it meant nothing and followed the other man's lead. Adam led them to Tony's office and shut the door. Tony did his best to hide behind an uncaring air but it was much more difficult in the quiet and relative privacy of the small room. He wasn't sure he could hold out here but he was hell bent on trying.

“What is it?” He tried to turn his lips up into a small smile. It didn't work. His palms were sweaty and his heart was racing. But he was a professional at hiding his true feelings. Thanks to Adam he had had years of practice.

“What is it? I'm sorry, did I just dream last night or something? Why did you leave? I couldn't find you all morning or most of today. Why are you acting like this?” The questions exploded out rapid fire from tight lips and a furrowed brow. Oh, Adam wanted to play at this game? He had been running a muck with Tony's heart for years and now he was supposedly the victim? Fear quickly snapped to anger. Years of bitterness and love spiraled inside Tony's gut making him feel ill and angry.

“Like what Adam? I'm sure you know what a mistake last night was. We were drunk, blowing off steam. It was nothing.” The words made Tony want to vomit. The lies burned like acid on his tongue but if Adam was going to break his heart in to pieces he was going to beat him to the punch. The road to self destruction was the only open path he could see.

“Nothing? I wasn't drunk. I don't drink anymore, you know that. Damn it, I knew you were more wasted than you let on. I'm sorry, I had no right to take advantage." Adam's sudden and earnest apology threw Tony completely off guard. Thinking back to the night before he could recall somewhere along the way trying to convince Adam of his sobriety, of his ability to consent. He remembered flirting back in his own awkward and uncouth way and very much to his surprise it actually working. He was so caught up in remembering the blur of the night before he almost missed Adam's continued babbling. "Did you really think last night was a mistake? I thought you—”

“You thought I what? I'm not some star eyed groupie fawning after your affections Adam, not anymore. You've made it perfectly clear what your feelings are for me, none of which include affection, respect or... or anything else of that nature.” He nearly choked on the words. Love, he had almost said love. He was an idiot and still holding on to an impossible dream. As if Adam could love him.

“I'm sorry about what I've said in the past, how I've treated you, Tony. I truly am. We talked about it last night. I have never been good at facing my own feelings especially about this stuff. But I do...I trust you. I depend on you. I need you in my life. I just—I've never been good at doing these things in the right order. But I care about you.” Adam leaned in close. His hand rose to cup Tony's jaw. The smaller man flinched away.

“What are you playing at? What do you want from me?” Tony tried to pull back but he was trapped against his desk. This wasn't real. It couldn't be. For years Adam had been as clear as he was uncaring. He had broken Tony's heart time and again and now what? He finally loved him back?

“I want you.” Adam stepped closer as Tony leaned back. “I want to be with you.” Warm hands reached up to cup his face. It wasn't real. He must have slipped in the kitchen and smacked his head. But it felt real. Adam's lips on his felt real. His body pressing Tony back into his desk felt real. His own arms moving to wrap around broad shoulders felt real. Tony held himself rigid just waiting for the other shoe to drop, for reality to snap back into place and devastate him.

"Don't cry, please Tony. I'm so sorry. You deserve so much better than me." Tony hadn't realized tears were falling from his eyes until Adam had spoken. He was crying and shaking. He was falling apart in Adam's arms and for the first time in their relationship Adam was there holding him, putting the pieces back together. Adam wiped away the tears with his thumb and pressed their foreheads together just breathing in Tony's scent while those gorgeous sapphire eyes dropped closed.

"I'll spend the rest of our lives proving it to you, I promise. But please don't hide from me. Don't pretend like this means nothing. I know you love me. It's the only thing I know I can count on in this life." Another kiss stopped the protests forming in Tony's throat. "You ground me. Now that I finally have my head straight I can see how much I need you." He kissed the words into Tony's lips and jawline. Tony couldn't speak. He was still confused but his brain was short circuiting as Adam was kissing his way down his neck.

"Let me prove it to you. Can I take you upstairs? Will you stay with me, please?" Adam's voice was thick with arousal. Tony gasped at the feel of the other man's erection pressing into his hip. He was serious. Searching brown eyes caught lust blown blue. "You left last night before we could shower. I promised you breakfast, too, a proper meal, just the two of us." Tony's insides were melting. He felt the logical parts of his brain turn to mush. But he also felt something bitter and self hating begin to thaw. He soaked up Adam's sweet words like the sun. It all felt so surreal.

"Yes." He didn't sound confident. He didn't feel it either. But the look of sheer joy that reflected back in magnificent blue eyes at his agreement had Tony's heart thumping with hope. Adam kissed him again, joyful and a bit too hard. Tony ended up arched back over his own desk grabbing hold of Adam's shoulders like a lifeline. Hands found their way to his tie and belt. Clumsy attempts were made to rid him of the barriers between them. Tony forced his hands to still his lover.

"Take me to a bed, Adam. I'm all for passion but I do not want to be doing the walk of shame up to your room after fucking in my office." Adam's smile was goofy and bright. Tony hadn't seen him smile like that in years.

"Right," Regretfully he pulled back but just as quickly had Tony in his arms. "We're going to have sex in this office one day, and every flat surface of the kitchen, too." The husky promise had Tony blushing. He had no doubts Adam would make good on his word.


End file.
